But under the layer of supportive writers, great writing advice, and just great people worth knowing, there is a dark underbelly of etiquette. It's just like every aspect of life - there are some people who do it, and some that don't and really piss you off.
So, my writer friends, do you follow the rules?
Don't badmouth other bloggers by name or distinguishing characteristics. You just don't. Whether you like them, don't like them, not friends, not following them, they crap all over things you like, etc, doesn't matter. You can't point out someone and say bad stuff about them. You never know who's reading or who DOES like them. It's rude. And more importantly it makes you look like a turd. And no one likes to read another bloggers hate. (not people you want to know anyway.)
*Don't badmouth publishers, editors, agents either. BAD BAD...oooh that's just bad. Don't do that.
Don't comment derogatory things on other people's blogs that put's the blogger or any other blogger down. This one is pretty simple, though hard for people to understand it seems. But the rule goes back to "if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all." I'm not sure why that went out of style. If you don't dig on what someone is posting about, just leave. No one is forcing you to read it. No one is making you comment. Just. Leave. (unless they are talking bad about your mother. But, since they negated the very first rule by making fun of your mother, well...they're asking for it.)
If you ask a favor of a blogger be prepared to compensate. We are busy, writers. We work, we have kids, family, lives, books to write, and deadlines to make. You want something, you have to be willing to make it worth our while. Yes, people should do nice things for the pleasure of doing nice things. BUT, if you aren't good friends with a person, that blogger owes you nothing. (take advantage of friends)
So, if you want something, you got to have something up your sleeve to offer. Need someone to read for you? Be prepared to have that favor called on you whenever. Want something posted on someone's blog? Candy will usually do. Want a writer to write something for you? That might take cash...
It doesn't have to be a big something, it doesn't have to be much more than a public thank you, but you have to do something to show your appreciation. (them's the rules)
Give credit where credit is due. Pretty self explanatory. You take something from someone's blog, you give them credit. (Duh.)
White space, White space, White space. It's a favor to your readers to offer this up. If you write posts in one huge paragraph, chances are good that no one is really reading you. Might be hard to hear(read), but from one
Answer comments. It's another simple one to read, but not always followed. Readers do you a great honor to stop by and take the time out to say something to you. You do not have opinions made of diamonds. You may have things to write people want to read but there are a bajillion blogs out there to read. No one is beating down your door begging you to post just one more post like you're the freaking crack fairy of south street.
People don't stick around if you never acknowledge them. Be humble, answer comments.
These are just a few, but very important things to remember. If you have more to add, please share away!
DON'T FORGET! You have 13 days to sign up for Alexia and my first blogfest! You could get free stuff, it's easy to enter, and...you could get free stuff! So...DO IT. Thank you!! (see, you must write a short something, but we're giving you a shot at something! Compensation, my friends.)
**Lots of Lolcats!
I'm guilty of the last one. I always mean to comment on what other people say, but then I get busy and forget. After a while, it just becomes easier to read their comments and not acknowledge them. Bad bad blogger. Thanks for pointing that out. I'll try to do better in the future.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the reminders. Sometimes it's better not to comment but people don't always get that.
ReplyDeleteLooking forward to the Blogfest. I know it's going to be fun!
It doesn't bother me when newbie bloggers break these rules, because I was guilty of some of them myself in the early days. It's when the vets do it that frosts my cookies.
ReplyDeleteI better win one of the prizes, because I've already picked out which release I want. :D
Hi Colene,
ReplyDeleteNo words were spoken truer. Well said,
ON a more fun not.... I'm back at Wizarding World! Have fun pics if you have the chance to stop by. I know how you love HP.
This is a good set of blogging rules. I've been guilty of breaking a couple of them many times. But I'm learning. :P
ReplyDeleteI agree with all except for maybe the last one. I would rather have someone visit my blog then answer my comment, especially if my comment simply requires a "thanks." I think I do a good job at both...most days! Lol!
ReplyDeleteGreat advice, all of it. Especially giving credit and answering comments. I'm not always great at responding to comments, but I try.
ReplyDeleteBahahaha I'm still laughing at the pictures, oh that made this post ROCK MY SOCKS OFF!!!
ReplyDeleteYou gave so many great things here!!! I agree on all accounts. I do my best to answer all comments but when one gets busy there are things that have to go so I don't always answer like I'd like.
Maintaining is a whole other story. I do my best to take time to answer those who stop in and say hello and visit as many blogs as I can. I do love to give thanks and appreciate several people and I do my best. I don't want enemies or people angry so I'll be sure to do my best at everything I do!
FANTASTIC POST (as usual)!
Such good advice! My mother drilled the "if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all" into me at a young age, and it definitely holds true in the blogosphere!
ReplyDeleteGreat tips. These courtesies should be present in real life as well as blogging. :)
ReplyDeleteAll incredible intelligent rules to live by. Especially the no bad-mouthing agents/publishers thing...hooo! That's a biggie.
ReplyDeleteBahahaha, totally agree. Love it. I don't even like to say who is my favorite agent or publisher...that's just as bad as badmouthing in my opinion!
ReplyDeleteAgreed - these are EXCELLENT tips for bloggers!! You've nailed it. And I know I've been a big ol' slacker on the last one. I try to atleast blanket-thanks to all commenters directly on my post when I don't get around to doing it personally via e-mail. I prefer the personal touch, but when I get super busy...I'm afraid that's the one that gets left behind... :( You, on the other hand, are GREAT with that one! Appreciate your thoughtful posts!
ReplyDeleteI love your rules! It's all about respect. I try to follow all of them.
ReplyDeleteAnd thank you for reminding me about the blogfest. Sometimes I forget when I sign up for these things. I saved a draft post in blogger :-)
That's a pretty good list of rules.
ReplyDeleteOthers that come to mind (and they might just be personal preference):
1) Make it easy for people to follow. Don't hide the follow button way at the bottom of your mile-long side bar.
2) DO make space for people to comment. I do not go to your blog to be preached at.
3) DO follow back. It seems pretty arrogant if you don't.
4) Please please please give me an idea of how often you blog (even if it is only once a week). And try to blog as often as possible. Posting three random times in month seems like you don't give a darn about building a relationship. And then you expect us to care about your posts?
Yep... I think those are the big ones for me.
:-)
I hate rules! But these aren't really rules to me. It's more like common sense. Misha right about following back. I think a lot of newbies don't know that one. Ahem. And I love, love, love all your lolcats. Especially the one with the bear. :-)
ReplyDeleteVery true. I don't want to be a turd! Love the kittie pics :O)
ReplyDeleteMost of those should be common sense – at least the first few. The last ones I think we learn as we go. As for comments, I respond to questions or comment on great tips but I don’t think every comment needs to be responded to. Why? I know I don’t go back and check a blog unless I had a question.
ReplyDeleteI love the pictures! They always make me smile:)
ReplyDeleteVery good rules to remember. I try to respond to comments by email, but there's always some folks who don't have their email address linked to their blog. But there are some times I get busy and forget.
Great post. You've covered some really important things here. This should be one of those things you accept to before you get a blog...you know where you have to click on the accept button before moving on :)
ReplyDeleteWith that said, I know people get busy. I'm busy all the time, so if I don't always get a reply it's okay. I'm kind of trying something different. Instead of replying by email to all the comments, I reply on my blog and then try to visit the others that have visited me. I feel so much more connected to them :)
Thanks for the post! I love the pictures.
I follow all the rules except the last. Between working a demanding full time job, writing, CP duties, blogging and reading and commenting on my friends' blogs, I was badly running out of time, and my writing was suffering. I canvassed opinion on my blog - would people mind if I didn't reply? Would they rather I spent the time on their blogs, if that was a choice I had to make? They preferred me to visit their own blogs, so that's what I do, and I do make sure I visit everybody who comments on my blog. I think that shows the same level of respect, and saves my sanity a litle! I know some bloggers (you not included) who respond to my comments on their blogs, but never visit mine--to be honest, I think I'd rather they came visiting!
ReplyDeleteGreat rules. I'm guilty of the last one sometimes. I wish Blogger had an option to comment on each comment like wordpress does. I'd comment back more then.
ReplyDeleteBlogger should make you sign these rules when you start up a blog. Even if you hate something, that's no reason to eschew courtesy.
ReplyDeleteI think you have a great list of rules, Colene. I think white space is the one I violate the most, but I swear, I DO NOT do it on purpose. I really wish blogger wasn't such a brat about certain things - like if you type a post in Word and paste it in, it just has to go screwing around with the format. Man does it get annoying. If that is the case, the least they could do is have a better spell-check.
ReplyDeleteI also wish blogger would send an e-mail when you get a new follower. It would be much easier to notice them.
Lots of common sense here. I'm with Amie. I admit I routinely break the "Answer Comments" one (don't kill me!). I figure I can either visit the commenter's blog, or answer the comment, but I just don't have time to do both. I like to give the courtesy of visiting the blog instead, which ironically ends up taking way more time.
ReplyDeleteKudos to those who can do both!
These pictures are hilarious! They made the great post....kick even MORE ass!
ReplyDeleteI try to do all of that. I'm horrible at the last one though :S
I just don't have the time. And I feel bad, really I do. What I try to do is make sure I visit the blogs of people who comment on mine before anyone elses - because I want them to feel as special as I did!
Awesome post. I have to agree with you on the white space tip. If I visit a blog and there is one very, very long paragraph I leave!
ReplyDeleteUp until last week I used to reply to every comment via email and within the comment box, but it took time away from visitng other blogs. Now I only reply via email if I need to further the conversation and I don't reply within the comment box. However, I do visit the blog of anyone who comments. It has been the best decision I have made because I have so much more time to visit other blogs!
p.s. thank you for the MC naming suggestion yesterday!
Oooh, this is the first time I've seen a bloggers rules post and I love it! Awesome job and I agree with them 100%. Have an awesome week:)
ReplyDeleteHAHA! These are all true, but I especially like the White Space one! VERY true! If I just see words words words words words words words words words words words words words words words words and I'm in a rush (which, unfortunately, I usually am) then I kinda.... just... skim or leave!
ReplyDeleteI agree with all your points! The last one is the toughest for me to keep right now, but I try to visit all the blogs of the commenters to make up for it.
ReplyDeleteThe way I look at it - I always forget to go back and see if someone responded to my comments, so I'd rather see a comment from them on my blog.
And white space is SO important! Sometimes it's the difference between me reading and not reading a post!
THANK YOU!!!
ReplyDeleteAlso, make sure you have your profile setup so I can FIND YOU!! That makes me crazy!
Good list, seems like common sense, but it just isn't. Sadly.
It all comes down to living a courteous, honorable life in all we do, doesn't it? Great post. Love the cat quips. Have a lovely day, Roland
ReplyDeleteHoy there! A lot of good stuff!? (sounds a little like you encountered some bad behavior recently and I feel a little like I've had a lucky escape to be clueless on the details). I think I mostly do okay. I run long, and while I comment back most of the day, often I see comments the next morning for the day priors blog and those are hit and miss... I try to be nice though!
ReplyDeleteDefinitely being courteous and nice though... I sometimes will post a counter-point (and people will with me) if the belief or experience is different, but there is NEVER a reason for those not to be polite!
Basic rules everyone should follow. Disable Captcha people!
ReplyDeleteWell said, Colene. I think that fairy came over to my blog. I caught a little dust and had to call out the dogs.
ReplyDeleteDid you mean the Delusional Doom Blogfest? I wrote it today.
Nancy
N. R. Williams, The Treasures of Carmelidrium
Excellent post, Colene. I especially love the kitty pics to emphasize your points. Too cute. :-)
ReplyDeleteyou would think these truths would be self-evident... I think the lolcats help~ :D <3
ReplyDeleteI agree with everything you said. The most challenging for me is responding to comments, usually due to lack of time. Great post and the kitty pics :D
ReplyDeleteYeah you said some good stuff! I've been doing it a long time and the white space one is huge to me :D. I think you respond to comments if a questions is asked, OR give their blog a visit too. Doing both can be a huge time suck -I think one or the other is acceptable. No acknowledgment, however, is not!
ReplyDeleteGreat post and great rules. I don't always follow the last one but I'm going to work on it.
ReplyDeleteThis post hits home for me. I'm newish and learned some of tess from watching other bloggers. Some of them I instinctively knew. Thanks for a comprehensive list. I wish there was a blogging tips page before you could design your first page.
ReplyDeleteExcellent post. This is something that everybody should read -- we all could use a brush up from time to time. Well said, Colene!
ReplyDeleteFantastic advice Colene! The comment one is big for me--if I never, ever get any love from a blog I visit I get less and less interested in going. Kind of like having a "friend", but it's always you who calls them up, asks them out. Ya know? No one wants to be that friend. Responding to comments (by email, but especially by visiting the commenter's blog and returning the favor) says "I see you" and "I value you." So important in this crazy world of blogging.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the great list!
These be the golden rules. Thanks for bringing them to the forefront. Thanks, Colene!
ReplyDeleteGood advice, i will keep those rules in mind.
ReplyDeleteMost of these are pretty normal give and take I would think. I personally don't respond to comments very often. I read them (ofcourse) but I decided long ago that I would have to choose. Either I respond to every comment individually OR I take the time to go read their blog and leave a comment in turn and I decided to do the latter since I think in the long run, it means more to the person. So iff someone's left me a comment, I make sure to return the favor within the week.
ReplyDeleteWhip us in shape, Colene! Good stuff here :)
ReplyDelete