Did anyone else know there were people on twitter that weren't writers/publishers/agents/interns? What do they do? Okay, I knew that, but still. It's baffling.
I'm working on my patience and attitude these days. Querying has a way to burn the best attitudes, and I surely don't have the best. I actually really enjoy querying. It's exhilarating. But it is still a process that can beat me down, just like anyone else.
I was down at work one day and my boss noticed (whoops, check that shiz at the door, ya'll). He said "Happiness is a state of mind. You can chose to cross that state line anytime." He went on to explain how, while it's normal to feel down and all that, we have the power to choose how we let things affect us. Natural reactions to rejection are anger, sadness, discouragement, etc. But we can chose to find another perspective. We can decide how we let things affect our lives. This is what I'm working on as I continue to query. It's working. Sort of.
It's kind of a process. You have to first recognize when you're letting things get you down. Sometimes it sneaks up on you. And then you have to change your way of thinking. That part is even harder.
HA! "I Am A Man of Constant Sorrow" just came on my Pandora Station. Fitting? Funny. (It's an Alison Kraus station btw...so shut up.)
Anyway, my boss is just full of wisdom he likes to pass along, and I'm happy to take. On the rare instances I've opened up with him about writing, he asks me what I'm doing to progress. Each time I make the mistake of saying "I'm trying to get an agent right now" (we have only talked about it a few times this past year). And he gets this look. It's hard to explain. It's like an "awe, poor thing" face. He says trying is a backdoor word. In reality, you're either doing something or your not. When you add "trying" on to anything you're doing, you're giving yourself an out, an escape, an excuse.
This is true, isn't it? Think how often you "try" to do something, fail, shrug, and give up. "Well, I tried, so it's okay." "At least I tried". How often have we had that pounded in our heads? But most of the time, I'll admit, with things I've given up doing, I may not have done the best I could have. I tried. But I didn't go all out for it like I could have. Trying is like driving with your parking brake engaged. Holds us back.
Can we stop trying and just do that shit? Can we change our attitudes and not let things be so crushing to our lives? Sure! Lets.