When are you a writer?

This week I have been reaping the benefits of The Blog Trifecta, that is bloggers Jennifer Daiker, Elana Johnson, and Alex Cavanaugh. They have been offering up amazingly useful advice on getting your blog up and at 'em! Suggest checking into what they have to say and taking it from me that it works! All of it!

What I have been curious about for a very long time(since I fell in love with writing actually) is: When can I start calling myself a writer?

When I joined my critique group they wanted my info to put on the website but I wrote an email back asking that I not be represented at all. I remember, 2 years-ish ago, that my reason was because I didn't want to jinx myself.

I thought if I was put on that website, declared myself a writer for all to see, I would fail. I have a firm belief that when I put my intentions for my life out there before I get an anchor in the wet ocean bottom of my feelings, I will always let people down. I will never finish and people will say "we knew she wouldn't/couldn't do it" and I will be a public failure.

But if I kept it to myself and I failed I wouldn't disappoint(or confirm my lack of talent) to anyone.

My mother tells me I have confidence issues, that I'm better than I think. Maybe. Maybe that's just mom talk though.

Either way I decided I wasn't going to consider myself a writer until I was recognized by someone else as such. And by that I mean someone with a check in their hand with my name on it.

It took me ages just to make a blog for myself. And almost as long to describe myself as a YA writer. It feels like I might as well hop on top of a building and declare myself a superhero and try to fly.

I still don't know if that's right or wrong of me to feel that way. But I do wonder what other people think.


And just because I promised it a long time ago, my portrait of Matthew Gray Gubler:

For anyone who has been keeping up, I LOVE The Hunger Games Trilogy. Found a great poll(if you have read the last one as spoilers abound) HERE on the Adventures In Children's Publishing blog. (spell check is telling me "Children's" is spelled wrong. LIES.)


And last link for the post: I have linked her before but shes worth mentioning again.This Chick debuts her first novel, Across the Universe, in January! On her blog you'll find links to a couple contests to win a copy. Also she has the first chapter posted for all to adore.

So, being a relatively new blogger I have a stupid question: what is ARC? And how are books that haven't come out yet being recommended to me to read? What am I missing here, cause it seems big and really really good.

Stop back Friday for some fun and a chance to win something that rhymes with Schplook.

Happy Wednesday!

Long winded story that goes nowhere. Happy Labor Day!

I went to Walgreen's to buy some gloves for work. While there, I couldn't help myself, as I have a condition I call candymouthitus, and wandered down their magnificent candy section. There, on the bottom shelf was the devil in disguise as 3/$3 Sour Punch Straws. Be still my beating heart. If you have never tried them(omg...really?) its sour+gummy+straw.

So, of course, I can't help myself and get 3 packages(who could waste a good sale like that?) then I think, "self, what if later tonight you want some chocolate." This is rare. The only chocolate I really like must be partnered with peanut butter. Which is a freak thing because I don't like peanut butter. But it could happen(it didn't)

Naturally I have to get some Reese's cups, just in case. But, this is how my mind works: If I buy one package it will look like this is all for me and I'll have to do the register walk of shame with my gloves and handfuls of candy. If I buy 3 packages of Reese's this guy will think I'm a teacher buying stuff for my class or something and won't suspect that I am a horrible candy-pig.

LONG STORY just to say - I get to the counter and the first thing the guy says is "This is all for you isn't it?" Swear. Just ring up my stuff and keep the judgie to yourself, Walgreen's man.

These are the hat's I'm painting for my best friends bachelorette party in October. (sorry about the fuzziness. They're sparkly too but..yea.)

Donno about everyone else, but my facebook has been taken over by football statuses(statusi?). I might just stop signing on(who am I kidding?) I don't mind football, I actually like it alright as far as sports go, though it's no hockey. But I don't care to read play by plays of the hundreds of different(5)teams in one night.

THIS lovely blogger was discussing the first, voluntary, book you ever read and how memorable it becomes. I debated posting my perspective in her comments but decided it was long winded(like a lot of my answers/stories) and that she might not really give a crap. So:

Zel was the first I remember reading all on my own, by choice. I was with my grandmother at the library looking at tapes to check out, don't remember how old. But I do remember picking it out, being bored at the time, and reading a little there while I waited on my g-ma.

I remember how it made me feel, reading it. How spellbound I became almost immediately. And the thrill reading gave me. Still have that thrill when I read. And years later I bought that book and still read it occasionally, just to experience it all over again. And I do. The feeling I had way back when, it's still in those pages. Makes me miss my grandma even more than I usually do. Miss those days I got with her, eating apples and cheese and taking her old blazer in to the shop every other week.

I just loved that Creepy Query Girl made a whole post dedicated to that. Made me reminisce about life then, feelings, and who I was.

If you haven't read it, Zel is a very quick read and worth every second.

This weekend my writing went down the toilet. Painting and exploring homemade headboards took over my focus. I'm diggin on that. Well, a cheaper variation using mosaic tiles maybe. Or just painting something.

Trying to gather as much blogging advice as I can and searching for fun things to get involved with and do on this thing. Any great suggestions, I would love.

Also going to post an excerpt from my novel this week just for funzies.

Happy Labor Day!

2010 Banned Book Challenge

As you can tell, I have decided to join in. It's a wonderful idea and I hope everyone considers joining in if not publicly, then just for yourself. Runs September 1, 2010 to October 15, 2010. Catch the blog post for more details HERE

I don't object to one person not wanting something kept from their own child, that's their right as a parent BUT it is not OKAY to ban something from the public at large. American's have the right to write what they want.

Publishers have the right to publish what they want.

Readers SHOULD have the right to read what they want.

ANYWAY, small soapbox stand over. I think what got me ticked the most was seeing the Harry Potter books on banned lists everywhere! WHAT!? My Harry Potter tattoo and I are horrified!

My moto is "If you don't like it don't do it."(to be taken carefully. If i applied that to my whole life I would be sitting on my couch watching ICarly, slipping into a nacho-cheese coma right now.) I apply it to books, movies, music, TV, places, people. I don't like soggy shoes, so I tend to avoid them. But I'm sure someone out there doesn't feel the same, so who am I to ban soggy shoes?

In my search for some banned books I found a list of 55 books being petitioned in my area by an organization. 55!! So, as a personal stickin-it-to-the-man, as I work in the town that is banning beautiful books, I chose a few of them.

My Goal: 3.

Forever - Judy Blume
The Rose and The Beast - Francesca Lia Block
The Teenage Guy's Survival Guide - Jeremy Daldry

I don't dabble in reviews. I'm not good at being tactful or un-opinionated. So I won't be reviewing the books chosen BUT I would like to discuss them and their content for which they are in trouble over once I have done all 3. Check back in for that later on.

Are you reading for the BBC this year?

5 Followers! and a sausage-boy reference deleted

Okay, so this is a milestone for me, albeit a silly one to someone who doesn't have a blog maybe. But its huge to me!

Thank you. My heart did a little jig when I logged in today. I really do appreciate it!

At work, where you'll find me 3.5 days out of the week (short work week, long work days to compensate, so don't get jealous.), it's the last day before a long weekend. Now you may be jealous. 4 day weekend with nothing solid planned= my favorite.

I intend to type in my edits today but this weekend I want to finish what i have. This week I haven't done a thing on it. Instead I got distracted by a new idea and bought a notebook.

Writers, writers blogs, etc have told me for the past 2 years that they always have a notebook with them, always writing in a notebook, always needing to get a new one but this is the first time I have understood the importance.

I always brushed them off. "Oh I'll remember whatever i want to get down when I get to my computer." "oh, please, I'll never read through my scratch of notes." I suppose that is the generation I grew up in. Technology FTW!

And today I want to slap my past self right in the mouth. I love love love my little notebook! I have been plotting out, researching, and theorizing all week in it! My advice for anyone starting out: Get a notebook! (and don't roll your eyes)^_^

This chick cracks me up.
My special favorites are: "Stare at the internet" and "53. realize you've written another 100 pages OH GOD WATCH OUT ROWLING" XD

Bed situation still sucks. Hopefully will force my husband into going shopping with me but that isn't looking promising. He seems to be under the impression that I am hard to shop with. Donno why...can't possibly be my fault he feels this way. Leaning toward another memory foam (toxicity be damned) or pillow top.

Book shopping must be done this weekend too. Getting so many recommendations for some great YA. So many being released I have had my eye on. Its ridiculous how much I love reading YA. And It's getting hard to keep up with all the books coming out, which is incredibly wonderful that there are so many great YA reads!

Have you read about Steph Su's Banned Book Challenge yet? Looks amazingly fun! Debating joining in. Going to do a little looking into it today and see what I can come up with for my goals. Keep you posted on that.

For someone who said they had no weekend plans, I sure have made quite a few in the past half hour.

I want to mention quickly that my first book, he-who-shall-not-be-published-ever, I took the "if I write like a 100 year old English professor I'll surely be seen as knowledgeable and exceptionally brilliant writer!" My gosh, I wrote that whole novel like a creepy old man.

Don't. Especially when writing YA. What kid wants to read something written that way? NONE. Most kids i knew DIDN'T read unless forced. Why would you make it harder to get kids to love to read? If they don't recognize the voice/language, if they can't relate to vocabulary or understand big unnecessary words, they aren't going to keep reading you. You'll be lucky if they don't use your book for Mr. Pebbles the hamsters shavings.

A lesson I learned the hard way. I didn't understand what it meant by using your own voice. But it makes life for a writer SO much easier to just write like themselves. It was 10x harder to be a fake professional than writing my way.

Happy Labor Day Weekend!

That was awesome!

Now what?

As predicted, I did only a few pages of edits (10) this week.

Tuesday was consumed by Mockingjay. I would have finished if I hadn't forced myself to not read after I got home from work and to save some for the next day of work.

But by Wed. it was impossible not to just bust it out. I had to keep going. I had to know. I was consumed! I love it. Finished it. Put it down. Sat for a moment. Couldn't resist posting my opinions on a few spoiler blogs about specifics. Then...I sat some more. Decided I needed to sleep. Laid down. And thought about it some more.

It's impossible to let it go! All tonight i have been trying to hunt up a book that can take its place but nothing is jumping out at me except one book, Across the Universe, that's not due out until 01/11/11!! The first chapter, I fell into. But now must wait on that one!

Any suggestions of a good YA book that could possibly follow Mockingjay would be much appreciated.

Not only was Mockingjay probably the best, most perfect, conclusion to a much loved series but also, it has hindered my ability to focus! Not only because it's one of those books that sticks with you like gum on the bottom of your boot(you know the ones) but also because i look at my own books and crinkly my nose up at them.

All I can think about is how incomparable my material is next the that. How I could only dream of wrenching a readers heart like Suzanne Collins did. How mine looks like middle school creative writing assignment i did the Sunday before it was due compared to THAT.

And because I'm feeling inadequate, I can't write like myself. I find myself trying to evoke the same kind of emotion and mine isn't about that kind of human interaction, strife, etc. It's different. And because it's different, I'm different, and my style is different all I can do is just stop for a while. Because if I try and go on right now I'll just taint my own voice and it will be all wrong. Not me.

I think I just described Mockingjay as "so good you'll think you suck at life"

Kinda bummed, kinda elated. Kinda needing a new book! What comes next? OH:

Paranormalcy looks good. I have been hearing/reading good things about that a lot lately. Probably because it comes out next Tuesday. There. That's life after Mockingjay.

Today I babysat a wonderful 2 year old. He's a doll but I enjoy children I can give back to their parents. Kids=A-OKAY as long as they go home when they start fussing.

Saturday I have a girl coming over to have some art finished up, hopefully.

And Sunday my husbands best friend, who's memory foam mattress we have been loving for about a year now, is coming to reclaim his possessions now that he is able to claim them.

This weekend is devoted to getting back my own head and heart for my writing and to morning the loss of the mattress from heaven. Come Sunday night my back will wish it were dead when we go back to our old bed.

Any suggestions on a good book, mattress type, or any other advice would be lovely.

Dancing, Reading, and a bit of Writing

I learned this weekend that it is impossible to sneak up on my husband with 5 cats in the house. They, curious as to why I'm standing in the dark guest bathroom waiting to pounce, blow my cover every time. And as I'm trying to be inconspicuous(and they are cats) cannot explain to them my need for stealth.

Who doesn't like giving your most loved person a good scare? Don't judge me.

As far as writing goes, I have printed out a good portion of my novel for my editing. Edited the first 5 pages of that aaaaand...nothing more.

This weekend has been dominated by rereading The Hunger Games(in prep for Mockingjay on Tuesday), working as a favor to one of my bosses on Saturday, and today grilling and watching Law and Order reruns. Busy? You bet your butt not.

I have thought of working on and off, but this website: QueryTracker.netBlog makes me feel a lot better about being a bum this weekend.

Monday I will get back to work and bust them out.

Got a bit of great news this past week. My very lovely, very funny, (very much missed since I moved to a new state 4 years ago) friend, Whisper, has agreed to help me with my novel content. I have my author, and so good at editing she should make it a career, friend going over all the grammar, punctuation, and structural things for me. What I have been lacking was content editor.

Mrs. Whisper reads YA a bit and will be able to help me decide whats appropriate, whats missing, etc etc. And I couldn't be more thrilled. She has already done chapter 1 for me with amazing results so I hope, pray, and might even do a little Whisper-dance to keep her on my reading staff.

Speaking of dancing, I can't help but want to Snoopy Dance every time I think about Mockingjay coming out on Tuesday! Who's with me? So Excited! Feels like I have been waiting so long for it. Oh wait, cause I have!

I'm going to have to work hard Monday on my own book because, come Tuesday, I'm going to be so absorbed in Katniss Everdeen and her serious woes. I doubt I'll notice if someone tried to cut off my own toe.

If you haven't read The Hunger Games and Catching Fire, do yourself a favor and get them. I haven't been caught up in a series like this since Harry Potter came out. And my Harry Potter tattoo should tell you something about that one.

If you haven't been able to tell as of yet, I am a nerd. I thank you. ^_^

I'm making my mom watch True Blood this week. I, reluctantly, let her borrow my first season b/c I, nor her friend, have been able to properly describe the sexiness of Eric Northman. Can you put that in words? I would like to see someone try.

I say reluctantly because it took me a while to get over the whole nudity factor when debating on giving my mom the dvds. I'm an adult, yes, but she is still my mother. My love for the show, Northman, and the story won over mother-modesty.

Fun fact: Eric Northman was Meekus(from zoolander). Love it.

Hoping everyone has a great week.

Things you learn on Youtube

It's been a long while since I last posted anything and there is a reason. Been busy. Suck on that nosy.
But no, I have been working hard on my novel and counting down the month until I can start reworking my second, nothing to do with the first, novel.

Got down for a while there about whether or not anyone would want to read the dribble I turned into a book but talking with some graciously wonderful, would have quit ages ago without them, authors. They say this is normal. And rather than offering a pill to kill my inner a*hole voice that is SUCH a downer, they say the only thing you can do is have faith in yourself. Get some feedback, that will most likely (unless you really do suck) reinforce the other voices in your head.

I say "voices" because, and it might just be because I'm a freak but, I have more than one that likes to be heard when I'm writing, editing, or just milling over what to do next. I only have the one nasty little jerk voice who tells me i suck and no one wants to read my crap. Which, could be very true as far as the publishing world is concerned. There is no guarantee you have worked so long and hard over the next New York Times Bestseller. BUT how will you ever know if you give up? That is another voice of mine. I like that one. :)

So I have been busy busy busy with my 5th edit which will be it before I hand it over to another author friend and my DUN DUN DUUUUUUN mother.

Mom is and has always been my toughest critic. I used to not ask her for any input b/c i didn't want to hear where i had gone wrong or what could make it better but that was with my drawings. And, to me, that is a different kind of talent all together. And not one i want to hear criticism on at all. Which is why I am not, never will be, and never want to be a professional artist. I do that for fun, stress relief, etc. Not to be judged.

BUT as far as writing is concerned, how can i ever get my novel passed an agent if my mom can't even get through it? So she is the next in line to hammer it out.

And I am a firm believer in polishing the CRAP out of my first novel before I query ANYONE (as hard as it is to not...)

I won't get another first impression on the industry. This novel will be the first novel of mine an agent, editor, publisher, and then the public will (fingers crossed) ever see with my name on it. I don't want it to be OKAY or worse, HORRIBLE. Who would ever read anything of mine again if my break out novel was either one? I sure don't waste my $$$ on OKAY writers. (haha...yea right) but you know what I mean.
Don't you want your first thing out with your name on it to be the best it possibly can?

dang I hate when I publish this thing while I'm in mid thought. My pinky is ENTER happy today.

So long absence and post to say I love youtube.com LOVE LOVE LOVE. You can learn ANYTHING on youtube. Today, on my lunch break, I'm going to watch last nights Trueblood (love that too) and attempt to trim my own hair thanks to youtube. Here's hoping i don't eff it up!

Toodles.